Kirei
by GloomyBumblebee
Summary: Satoshi Hiwatari once lost control. Who could have imagined that such unexpected consequences would take place? KradxDaisuke
1. Chapter 1: Lose Control

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Title: Kirei...**  
Author: **Gloomy Bumblebee**  
Genre:** Shounen-Ai**  
Subgenre:** Angst/Romance**  
Rating:** PG-13**  
Pairing:** DaisukexKrad**  
Summary:** Satoshi Hiwatari once lost control. Who could have imagined that such unexpected consequences would take place?**  
A/N:** Ne, I just HAD to do this. I don't know why, but I have a thing with non-cannon pairings. Kami-sama help me... By the way, 'kirei' means beautiful.  
**Note:** -_italics_- Dark's thoughts.  
'_italics_' Daisuke's thoughts.  
/_italics_/ Krad's thoughts.  
(_italics_) Satoshi's thoughts.

-o-

****

Kirei...  
Chapter 1: Lose control.

  
  
-_I'm telling you, Dai-chan, creepy boy has been acting pretty strange as of lately..._- The phantom thief, Dark Mousy, was talking to his host as the boy that carried his DNA walked to Satoshi Hiwatari's apartment. -_You shouldn't be near him, you don't know what he, or the beast within him could do to you,_- the thief warned him, but the boy took no heed of his friend's advice.  
  
'_Nothing bad is going to happen to me, Dark,_' the boy replied in a bored voice. For some odd reason, Dark was always worried about him when he and Satoshi met. Of course, Daisuke was perfectly aware of how dangerous Krad could be, but Satoshi knew how to control himself. If he felt the demon overpowering him and ready to make his appearance, he would alert him of the circumstances and give him time to escape. Yes, it had happened before. Still, Dark didn't seem to get accustomed to these situations and so, Daisuke had to bear with his warnings like he was doing at the time.  
  
-_Be careful, Daisuke_,- he pleaded once they had reached the boy's home. -_Please, don't take too long; hand him his homework and leave._- Daisuke snickered to himself as he ringed the bell. '_Seriously, Dark, you get into more trouble than I do; I can't understand how you can be so worried. And besides, you're here with me, if Krad appears you can take my place and get away from him. I trust you._' That did the trick. Dark felt now happy in his arrogant mood and kept to himself as Satoshi opened the door and greeted his friend.  
  
"Niwa-kun, konnichiwa!" he said as he let Daisuke enter his home. He was wearing faded pyjamas and his hair looked tousled; it seemed as if he'd just woken up.  
  
"Hiwatari-kun, did I interrupt your sleep?" Daisuke asked politely, to what the blue-haired teen shook his head. "Yokatta... ne, I brought you today's homework," he said, taking a couple of sheets from his backpack. Hiwatari closed the door behind them and walked to the living-room with Daisuke, where they sat on the couches to talk.  
  
"I'm sorry to ask, but..." Daisuke was looking at his friend with worried eyes. Now that the boy was close to him, he could see grey bags under his eyes and a sad look to them. "You don't look very well, Hiwatari-kun, is anything wrong?"  
  
"Everything is," said the tired-looking boy between sighs. He was running a shaking hand through his already messy hair, looking the most vulnerable Daisuke had ever seen him. Turning to look at his friend, Hiwatari smiled. "Ever since I met you," he said, "I have lived a life of chaos and disappointment. I haven't met true happiness, Niwa-kun, and yet I'm forced to endure more pain and despair." Those last words he spoke them through an unsteady voice, tears leaking from his eyes as he sobbed silently.  
  
Daisuke was rooted to the spot, feeling sad and guilty for what the boy had told him. Because of him, Hiwatari was miserable; because of the being that lived inside his body, because of his friend, Dark. And there was nothing he could do to change the way things were. He didn't want Dark to disappear and that would be the only solution to Hiwatari's problem. There wasn't a single thing he could do except being there for his friend. Daisuke hesitatingly circled his arms around Hiwatari's shoulders, embracing him, but the boy violently pushed his arms away.  
  
"Don't touch me!" Hiwatari protested between angry sobs, the tears falling into the floor, staining the blue carpet under the boy's feet. He was shaking now, looking paler than he'd ever been. A rosy tint had risen to his cheeks, making him look sick. Suddenly feeling heavy, he sat back on the couch and tried to calm down. In a quieter voice, he apologised to Daisuke, "I'm sorry, Niwa-kun, I didn't mean to hurt you."  
  
"It's okay," Daisuke replied. He was extremely worried for his friend, but he wasn't sure if he should get close to him or not. He just sat back on the couch, as far away from his friend as he could be. Silence wrapped them both for a few minutes in which Daisuke had gone quite uncomfortable. He wanted to know what had happened to Hiwatari to make him so depressed, but he didn't want to push him; he wasn't sure of how he could react.  
  
The blue-haired boy might have read his friend's mind, for he started telling him what was wrong. "Father kicked me out of the police forces," he said, "he realised I was never going to catch Dark..." he snorted bitterly after having said that. Daisuke still didn't know what to say. Somewhere deep inside of him he was a little confused at his choice of words. How could his father have 'realised' he 'wasn't going to catch Dark'? It just seemed odd, as if Hiwatari had a reason for not wanting to catch the thief. '_Dark-kun... should I ask?_' The thief remained silent for a moment; he was unsure of what to say. He had heard every bit of conversation the two boys had and was just as surprised and confused as Daisuke was. He wanted to know more than anyone else exactly what was going on behind Hiwatari's decision, but he knew better than to push him. -_No,_- he told his tamer before fading away, back into the deep recesses of his mind -_give him time, Dai-chan, he'll tell you eventually._-  
  
"I'm left to my own devices now, Niwa-kun," Hiwatari had started spoken again. "I have no one to trust and no one to care for me," he added, ignoring the cold voice in his mind that told him otherwise. "And do you know what makes this even worse?" Daisuke shook his head with uncertainty. "That all of this is my fault. I've decided not to catch Dark and I have a reason for it, too. My father found out about it... he said he didn't want to see me anymore." Sobbing silently, trying to fight back the overflow of tears, he smiled as he added, "that doesn't bother me, Niwa-kun, on the contrary. He's a complete idiot, I'm better off without him. What does bother me..." he said with doubt evident in his voice, "is what he said to me, how cruel he'd been when he found out."  
  
"What did he do?" inquired Daisuke.  
  
"He..." Hiwatari shook his head, "it's nothing, never mind. The only thing important is that he found out about the reason why of my decision and abandoned me. I've been abandoned for the second time in my life," he explained unwillingly, releasing the tears that had been struggling to flow. "And all because of a stupid weakness; a decision I could not deny myself."  
  
Daisuke was nearing tears himself. He wanted nothing but to understand his friend, but that seemed impossible at the moment. He looked away, afraid of what Hiwatari would think if he could see him on the verge of tears like he was at the time. Sighing, he gathered the courage to ask; he needed to know. "Hiwatari-kun," he addressed the boy as calmly as he could manage, "what is the reason for you to stop chasing Dark?"  
  
Hiwatari looked at him, incredibility evident on his gaze. Smirking, he moved closer to where Daisuke was sitting and asked in a eerie way that made Daisuke's neck hairs stand on end, "do you really want to know, Niwa-kun?" The redhead was unsure of what to say, but he nodded anyway. The smirk growing wider, Hiwatari cried the last tears he had left as he closed the distance between him and his friend and told him, "I fell in love with you, Niwa-kun." He was aware of the consequences of what he was going to do but he remained uncaring at the same time; surely he was allowed to lose control sometimes.  
  
Satoshi tilted the stunned boy's chin so that his eyes would meet those of sapphire blue as he pressed his lips to the boy's. The kiss was sweet, but desperate at the same time. Daisuke was frozen, he couldn't move. All he knew was that his friend, Satoshi Hiwatari, was kissing him. He let flow the tears he had tried to fight back, as he felt an increasing feeling of guilt invade his being. Everything was his fault, not Dark's, but his. He had been the burden on Hiwatari's way from the beginning. He deserved the unbearable punishment he was getting from the boy.  
  
Hiwatari was glued to his love's lips. He tasted every inch of pink flesh he found available, taking in the reminiscence of strawberries he found. He knew he had to let go soon, but he couldn't move. He wanted more and more of that sweet pain; he wanted the knowledge of what he could never have. He wanted to stay like that forever. But forever ended fast. As he felt the strong feeling of adoration the redhead made him feel, his DNA started to react. He had crossed the line, gone too far. He had finally lost control, something he had never done before. He hadn't been careful enough and the evil within him was going to seize the opportunity. Still, he could not take his lips away from Daisuke's.  
  
The pain he had felt in his back from sitting in an uncomfortable position became stronger; he could feel the skin covering his shoulders rip open to reveal the pure-white wings of the one that claimed to love him. The one that hurt him the most, even more than Daisuke, was showing himself. Hiwatari was forced back in the demon's mind, already missing the lack of contact and the feelings the kiss had evoked.  
  
Daisuke had his eyes closed; he had closed them somewhere in the middle of Hiwatari's kiss. He could still feel the other's lips in his; they seemed different, though and wondered why. He thought Hiwatari might be trying to smile or smirk, maybe he was trying to fight back a sob. Whatever the reasons were, his mouth felt different on Daisuke's. The pressure seemed weaker, somehow. It didn't matter anyway, since all the boy could feel was an increasing dizziness that soon became a glaring black veil around him. He felt nothing else.  
  
The demon within Hiwatari had been set free. Krad opened his honey-coloured eyes in amazement. He had never felt so unsure of himself in his life and that was saying enough, considering the length of it. What surprised him the most, was that he somehow understood what he'd seen and it almost made him feel sorry for his tamer. Never before had he felt anything for him, but sick devotion. Still, he now found himself thinking of what had happened between his dear Satoshi-sama and the red-haired boy he was in love with and feeling things he had never even considered, like pity. He could shield away from Satoshi's emotions -a protective technique he'd been using for centuries to prevent this kind of situations- and it had never failed him, yet now everything was different. The boy's emotions had been so strong and desperate, the unbearable pain flowing through his body like blood coursing through his veins that his barriers had collapsed. He had been just as vulnerable as Satoshi had been, feeling the same emotions the boy had felt. It had destroyed him and it had also made him whole; more than he'd ever been or felt.  
  
-o-  
  
There was nothing but a feeling of emptiness. He felt as if trapped in a void, nothingness engulfing him as he heard the faraway screams of help. He wasn't sure if they came out of his mouth or someone else's, but they pierced through his body like needles. He felt helpless and empty; he couldn't even feel his limbs, it seemed as if he were fading away, like he was a shadow of himself. Nothing seemed real in this world, everything around him were ruins of what used to be. He knew he'd been there many times, but somehow the place looked different.  
  
Thinking of himself and hearing the screams of help, pleading and desperate, he realised that place was similar to his own heart. The walls of black nothingness around him were crumbling and he was falling. Falling forever in the endless pits of sorrow, he remained silent. He didn't want to ask for help, he wanted to stop existing. He had no strength left to scream, anyway, he might as well let himself go forever. Maybe that way the pain would ease. Maybe that way he would find the peace he had never found inside himself. Maybe what he needed was to die, slowly, savouring each moment, each sense he lost. Yes, maybe that was what he needed.  
  
Then again, like everything he had ever needed, he knew he wasn't going to get it. It didn't matter how strongly he wished to die, it would only grant him a longer life, more time to ache. Everything had always been the same, why would anything change? But something did change and would continue to change because of him. Something had ceased to be to become something completely different. Something had been done and he didn't know when or why or even how. But something was already different and he would find himself as an unwilling witness of its future changes. And the worst thing was that he already hurt because of it.  
  
-o-  
  
Dark emerged from Daisuke's mind with a strong feeling of uneasiness and curiosity. His sixth sense told him that something was wrong, making him worry for his tamer. He had known from the very beginning that going to Hiwatari's home had been a bad idea, but once he'd seen the boy looking sad and broken like shattered crystal he had bit back his concern. Still, those feelings of worry were coming back to him, now strongly than ever and he felt the urge to make sure everything was right.  
  
But nothing, not even his trained sixth sense, could have ever prepared him for what he'd see when he looked through Daisuke's eyes. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the pain, jealousy and utter hatred he felt for the being before him; the one stealing his everything. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the sudden feeling of terror he felt as he screamed Daisuke's name over and over to bring the boy back to consciousness. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the ache he felt in his chest as he cried with anger and kept screaming, each time louder.  
  
Nothing could have ever prepared him for this.  
  
-o-  
  
Daisuke woke up at Dark's screams. He could barely feel his limbs as he came back to life, all the while hearing his name being screamed in desperation by his beloved DNA. He tried to block out the thief's voice, but to no avail. He wanted nothing but to stop listening to the painful shrieks erupting from his friend's throat; he was beyond all that. He'd heard things he'd never heard before and that struck him ten times worse and more painfully that Dark's voice. He wanted nothing more of that; he just wanted to be with himself. But it didn't matter how hard he tried, he could still hear the screams. Sighing inwardly, he opened his eyes to reveal himself to the outside world.  
  
Their eyes met; the both of them looking perplexed and scared at the same time. Each of them felt shivers running down their backs. The spark of what had been lost forever glared between their unbelieving gazes. Pulling apart slowly, they felt emptiness and longing. It seemed that even when they knew how wrong the situation was, they couldn't help but feel it right. It seemed that despite their different ideas and motivations, the both of them had the same needs. It seemed that even though they knew they would regret submitting to these sensations, neither could deny how much they wanted them.  
  
Minutes stretched, longer than they'd ever been, forcing them to react. Nothing could be said, but something had to be said at the same time. It seemed the two of them were trapped in a paradox they couldn't escape from. But one thing was sure: silence needed to be broken before things could get deranged and deformed more than they already were. Silence needed to be shut.  
  
Krad rested his tired being on the couch he'd been kneeling on, his frightened gaze never leaving that of his nemesis. The red-haired boy slowly pulled himself away from the demon, suddenly feeling calm though he remained confused. Daisuke watched as Krad touched his lips as if trying to understand what had happened to them, what the taste in them was. He watched as the blond said nothing and simply stared back at him. He watched and watched until silence was finally broken.  
  
"Leave," was all the demon said. Not a single threat was spoken nor a single movement was made, there was only a pleading. "Leave."  
  
Daisuke nodded weakly, he couldn't understand and he wasn't sure he wanted to. The only thing he knew and could remotely understand was that something had changed that day, something inside them had died. He couldn't speak for Krad and didn't want nor planned to do so, but he could speak for himself. And if there was something he knew was that with the breathtaking kiss he'd received, a little part of him had ceased to exist. That day, his innocence had died and he would never be the same.  
  
-o-o-o-__

Woohoo! The first chapter is finally over! I was inspired... things just flowed, it was really bizarre. I mean, usually I have to struggle to get decent descriptions and occurrences, but this time they just popped out of nowhere and forced themselves into these pages. Bizarre, I say... maybe it's the pairing... unusual, ne?  
Ne, now I'd like you to review this and tell me how good/bad I've done. I think this chapter (I won't speak for the whole story) has been my darkest piece of writing up to date, but you're the judges so... judge me. Please review this!! I need to know that someone is reading it!!


	2. Chapter 2: Waking Up

Note: -_italics_- Dark's thoughts.  
'_italics_' Daisuke's thoughts.  
/_italics_/ Krad's thoughts.  
(_italics_) Satoshi's thoughts.

-o-

****

Kirei...  
Chapter 2: Waking up.

  
  
There was nothing but silence. Exactly two hours had passed since Daisuke had last seen the demon's face and he still couldn't utter a word. Dark had been silent as well, having his heart broken without Daisuke even knowing. He had nothing to say, all he could do was cry and he didn't want his tamer to realise he was doing so; that is why he remained hidden for the day.  
  
Daisuke was alone then, lying on his stomach on the soft surface of his mattress. He could only think over and over about those last moments in Hiwatari's apartment. How he'd woken up to find he was sharing a kiss with Krad, how he'd been surprised by the stinging sensation on his lips and how the demon had looked so fragile as he pleaded for him to leave. Yes, he could only think about that, ignoring completely what those memories evoked inside of him. It had been almost traumatising to open his eyes to find Krad, but even though he couldn't find the words to explain it, he knew it hadn't been as terrible as it would seem. In fact, he was sure that Krad was thinking something above the same lines, a thought that disturbed him just as much as it filled him with hope. And hope was something he was lacking at the time. To make matters worse, he didn't know what he needed hope for; everything in his life was fine, he had no worries. Then, why did he suddenly feel like he didn't want to be alone anymore?  
  
Yes, that was something he hadn't stop to think about for a while. He was supposedly in love with Riku Harada and the girl was his girlfriend. Still, he never felt whole with her, they never even kissed. He couldn't count on her as a girlfriend, then; she couldn't give him what he needed. And what did he need? He needed someone to cling to when he was sad and depressed, someone to embrace him and wash all of his worries away. He needed someone that would kiss him softly as he cried...  
  
He didn't have any of that.  
  
'_Come to think of it,_' he thought, '_I've been blindfolded all this time, thinking that I had someone who loved me and understood me when I didn't. Funny how the one to trigger all of this uncertainty in me is none other than the one who wants to kill me,_' Daisuke finished that sentence feeling a little disappointed. It scared him to know that he might be developing feelings for the white-winged demon, but somehow those feelings made him feel alive. The despair in the knowledge of what was impossible for him ironically brought with it a sense of happiness. Unexplainable as it seemed, it sent a rush of adrenaline through Daisuke's veins.  
  
His life had been so repetitive as of lately, it was about time something exciting happened to drastically change his life. Having those revelations thrown at him in the face in a single kiss had been more than he could have ever hoped for. He ought to thank Hiwatari for teaching him what a kiss was and what sensations brought with it, yet he knew he wouldn't be able to face him. There was only one person he would gladly risk himself for and that was the one he was most scared of approaching, Krad.  
  
Deciding he was too tired to continue dwelling on painful subjects, he got up from the bed and headed for the wardrobe. He picked his pyjamas and went to have a relaxing bath. When he returned to his room, he lay back on the bed and slept. Once he felt rested and renewed he would start thinking clearly. He'd had much too information to process in the day and he wasn't sure he could endure any more pondering for the time being.  
  
Meanwhile, the dark angel within his body woke up. Getting dressed in a pair of loose trousers and a sweater, he left through the window into the open. He needed to go for a walk, to clear his mind and spend some time on his own now that his tamer was asleep.  
  
-o-  
  
The blond demon was still sitting in the same couch in which the red-haired boy had been two hours ago. He still couldn't understand how he had felt frozen, unable to move when his lips met the boy's. The only thing he understood, even though it made no sense to him, was the feeling of longing in him. After all, he'd never been kissed before.  
  
Yes, being a demon of more than five hundred years, he'd never been kissed. After all, his only purpose in life had been to kill Dark and he'd been sealed by the Hikari family for such a long period of time... he never really had the opportunity to kiss anyone to begin with and doing so wasn't something that had ever interested him much. He'd never even been in love, but being the representation of evil, it had seemed normal for him to not be. Obviously, no one ever told him he was loved, but that never mattered to him... until now. Now, after being kissed for the first time, after having experienced the sweetness of eager lips, now, he craved for all that he never had: love.  
  
Krad sighed, his breath slightly caressing his long, blond bangs. /_Why is it that I never stopped to think about these things until now? Why did that meaningless kiss mattered so much to me? Was it because it was the first one? Was it because of the one who kissed me? Why is it that even though I struggle to find answers I end up with nothing to tell myself?_/ Another sigh and he turned his gaze to the window. The sun had set and the night glared dark; he looked at the moon, bright as silver so pure and soothing. He gazed at it as he asked himself, /_why is it that I find myself attracted to this boy? Why is it that I long to kiss those lips once again? Why is it that I want to have him whole, rendered helpless in my arms?_/  
  
Silence. No one could give him answers. The pain inside him was suffocating; he'd never been so confused before and he doubted he ever would be. So many things had changed since that kiss, he wasn't sure he could ever be the same again. Still, there was one thing that remained intact, untouched: his devotion. The only problem was that he wasn't sure of whom he was devoted to, anymore.  
  
Picking himself up from the couch, he walked to Satoshi's room. The bed looked untidy and uninviting; somehow, the idea of lying on a bed reminded him of Daisuke; of his growing desire to have the redhead by his side, if only to tell him he loved him... Krad stopped dead in his tracks. Lifting a hand to touch his still sensitive lips, he wondered how he could have said such thing. He couldn't love the boy, he simply couldn't. He was destined to hate him and kill him, not to love him; that wasn't possible, it could not be. Still, there was something inside him that told him otherwise. A contradictory feeling that told him he was lying to himself, his own conscience was against him. There was no hope, it had never been any, but the need for it overpowered rationality.  
  
Krad wished he remembered how to cry because that was all he wanted to do at the moment. He felt helpless, unsure of what to think or what to do with himself. All of these situations were new to him and they scared him, something he hated to admit. Even now, as he turned his back and fled the room, escaping into the night's freedom, he could not understand what was happening to him. He had always been like an animal, acting on instinct; whatever he wanted he would try to get. Right now, though, it wouldn't be so easy. Right now, what he wanted more than anything was someone to love him and who would return his feelings, someone to kiss him and hold him when he felt desperate. He wanted Daisuke.  
  
Finally coming to terms with the changes taking place in his mind, he found himself walking through the streets of the Azumano district. His wings were folded, hidden under his heavy cloak; he felt relaxed in the overlapping of sensations, from the cold wind smacking him in his face to the warm sensation that the heat radiating off his folded wings sent down his spine. He realised as he walked down those deserted streets that he never took the opportunity to simply walk. Never in his entire existence had he used the body of his tamer to simply enjoy a stroll down the soothing green of a park or to take in the earthy scent of a forest. Right now, walking alone through these streets, he felt alive and almost content. There was only one thing lacking and he wasn't going to give in to the desire rising within him.  
  
He went round the corner, and saw the abandoned museum of Azumano district. He walked with a quick pace to the main gates of the ancient building. The entrance had been closed for ages, that much he knew, and that was why he was suddenly surprised when he noticed that the doors were open. /_Someone is here,_/ he thought to himself. He would have turned around and left if he didn't know exactly who was in that museum. Perhaps because of his instinctive nature or maybe because of his suicidal tendencies he walked into the museum, looking for the one that might give him some answers.  
  
Krad passed many dusty statues and torn up canvas, nothing really attracted his attention. Well, almost nothing did. There was one painting, the only one that remained intact, though still a little eroded by time. He moved closer to the small painting and as he approached it, he realised he'd already seen that picture somewhere. The image that was plastered on the canvas was one of a crucifix. The man crucified had wings; the one on Krad's left was black and the other was white. The demon read what was scribbled on the bottom of the canvas, he supposed it was the name of the painting: Oni to Tenshi. He was wondering why it didn't mention the artist's name, when he heard a strange noise coming from a nearby room. It sounded like a wail, something that intrigued him to no end and for no apparent reason. Guided by his curiosity, he walked to the source of the sound.  
  
As he went round a hall and turned to his left, the sound got louder. It no longer seemed a wail, but a moan. Krad thought it might have been a ghost, but that didn't stop his search. He turned many times and arrived to the exact centre of the museum. There was a massive fountain, or he thought it might have been one, with a stone statue of a dragon standing proudly in its centre. He turned around the dragon, hoping to find the mysterious source of the noise; as he turned, he gulped down the lump in his throat. Sitting behind the dragon's back was none other than Dark Mousy, crying loudly and asking 'why?' as he sipped on a bottle of sake.  
  
Krad stood uncertain for a while. He had never seen this side of the Phantom Thief, so vulnerable. And instead of mocking him and taking advantage of the situation, the blond could only feel pity for him. He didn't know what the thief was so sad about, but considering his own current situation, he knew he was suffering.  
  
A few more seconds passed until Dark turned his attention to the intruder. He eyed Krad up and down, studying him and probably wondering why he was standing before him quiet, doing nothing. Even though he was quite drunk, he could think clearly; Krad was there because he was looking for him. And it was a lucky thing that he was, because Dark himself wanted to talk to him.  
  
"Looking for me, Krad?" the thief asked in a perfectly understandable voice, something that surprised the demon, considering the thief's poor state.  
  
"Maybe," the demon replied.  
  
"Why, Krad?" the thief asked, confusing Krad who stood still with nothing to say. At the puzzled look on the demon's face, Dark explained, "why are you here?"  
  
"I needed time to think," Krad told him. It was true, he had gone for a walk to be on his own and to ponder on his situation. But Dark wasn't happy with the answer he'd got. He wanted to know more, he wanted to find out what Krad had been thinking about. Actually, he needed a confirmation; he already knew what he had to think about.  
  
"I guess our battle ends here. Should we call it a draw, then?" Krad was at a loss for words. He didn't understand what Dark was referring to. "You won't chase after me anymore, am I mistaken?" Of course, he wasn't. Krad looked away, biting on his lower lip that had started to tremble. He wondered how Dark knew about his feelings and what was the connection to his own for what he seemed so depressed. "I cannot blame Satoshi," the thief said, "but I can ask you: why didn't you pulled away when you realised you were kissing him? Why did you have to linger, making him think all of those confusing things? Why did you have to fall in love with him?"  
  
"I haven't fallen in love with anyone," Krad told him. He knew he was lying, but Dark needn't know. Still, it seemed like it wasn't easy to fool him.  
  
"It's going to take more than a bottle of sake to make me stupid, Krad," Dark warned him. "I don't live inside of your mind but I know what you think; I know how you feel and you should know how I feel as well. Or is it maybe that you don't want to see it?"  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about, Dark."  
  
"Yes, you do," Dark snorted as he got up. "Look, Krad, you would only hurt him so stay away from him. I love him more than you could ever understand and I will do anything to protect him." With that, the thief turned to leave.  
  
Krad stopped him, though, "I thought I loved my tamer, too, but in the end... well, you can imagine how the story ends." The blond walked past Dark and out of the museum, leaving the thief more depressed and desolated than he felt before.  
  
Inside Dark's mind rang a question; a question that passed unnoticed by the thief, even though it had been directed to him. '_Why didn't you tell me?_'  
  
Daisuke couldn't believe what he had heard. Nothing he had heard that night seemed real, it was all too confusing. He could recall having heard the thief tell Krad that he loved him; was he trying to protect him? Perhaps, though the idea seemed improbable. Still, Dark saying that he was in love with his tamer seemed just as ridiculous. He wondered if what Krad had suggested when he last spoke to him had been true and he hadn't misunderstood. Had he referred to Daisuke when he told Dark that he had been wrong to believe he loved his tamer? Daisuke surely hoped so.  
  
-_What did you see in him, Daisuke?_- asked Dark, finally accepting defeat.  
  
'_I saw nothing,_' Daisuke admitted, '_but I felt everything._' He spoke nothing but the truth. What had happened with Krad was pure love, adoration evoked by a mere touch of lip to lip. Nothing had been planned, he had never even imagined something like that could be possible.  
  
-_Funny,_- Dark snickered bitterly, -_that's how I fell in love with you._-  
  
'_I'm sorry, Dark,_' Daisuke apologised. '_If that kiss had never happened... I don't know how things would have evolved between us._'  
  
-_That's not helping, Daisuke,_- Dark told the boy. Knowing that there could have been a possibility between them made the pain feel ten times worse. Still, he was a righteous main deep inside and he had to do what Daisuke expected him to. -_If it makes you happy, go with him,_- he said, -_just don't expect me to help you._- He didn't speak a single other word after that.  
  
-o-  
  
Satoshi was lying on his bed. He had been sleeping since he transformed into Krad the day before. He had no idea of how he'd reached his bedroom and had been wrapped in those sheets, not even how he'd ended up clean and into those clothes. He thought it might have been Krad, there was no one else, after all. Still, he didn't really care. The demon had betrayed him, but he couldn't blame him. He had been the one to kiss Daisuke, he had been the one whose DNA reacted. It was his fault that Krad was now in love with Daisuke and it would be only fair that the boy would love him back. At least his stupidity would prove useful, then.  
  
/_Gomen nasai, Satoshi-sama._/  
  
/_I never meant to hurt you, Satoshi-sama. Please, forgive me._/  
  
(_...it wasn't your fault, Krad._)  
  
/_What do you mean?_/  
  
But Satoshi never answered him. Instead, he walked to the old, abandoned room under the stairs. He unlocked the door and entered the small space, while Krad asked him over and over what he wanted to do. He only said, (_something I should have done a long time ago_).  
  
The room was entirely black, except for the star-shaped lines traced in white. He moved to the centre of the room where the ritual altar stood. In its centre lay an old, tattered book and a black candle and next to those items lay a knife; it was made of blue crystal, its handle made of the purest silver with engravings of feathers. Satoshi lit the candle moving his hand over its wick and picked up the book; he flipped through its pages until he reached the last one and read aloud:  
  
_"In this glorious occasion I commend my body to the spectre of the night. Sacrifice white wings and breathe in the scent of death as I fade away into the embracing nothingness and bless you with my blood."_  
  
And as he spoke the last words, without thinking twice, he took the knife to his left wrist and made a deep cut, slashing the tender skin and letting the blood drip onto the candle as he felt his consciousness slip. Krad screamed desperate in his mind, but it was already too late.  
  
-o- 

_Oh, no! What happened there?? Yes, this is a cliffhanger, sorry about that... I'm telling you, writing this chapter physically hurt. I mean, my two favourite characters (Dark and Satoshi) are suffering like mad, they don't deserve to be in such pain. Ah, but this is for this pairing's sake. I hope I got this chapter well, but that depends on your judgement. Please, be nice, I'm in pain._

**Staryday: **you have no idea how much I loved to read that review. Thanks!  
**bladegryphon: **Aoi has been updated as well, do not fear .  
**KageKitsune16: **yeah, it was all rather messy, but I liked that. I truly hope you liked this chapter.  
**oOTsukasaOo: **yeah, they do look rather good, ne? Ah, well, I have a thing with these weird pairings... why can't I be normal???? Um, cough, anyway...........  
**Blue Eyed Angel2: **no, there's 1 (one) single other fic that I found. It's... let me check... yes, Raining Retribution by Yuki Haitani. It's more of a big love rectangle than a true DaixKrad fic, but still... less is nothing, my friends...  
**Felicity Dream: **no, thank YOU for reviewing this. Yes, this will be continued until it ends; it's only five chapters long though and there's an epilogue, too.  
**noone: **it is rather cool, ne? Daisuke is kawaii, who wouldn't love him? Well, actually I prefer Krad, Dark or Satoshi over him, but... I still love him . Ne, if you know at least one more DaixKrad fic, please, DO let me know about it!!


	3. Chapter 3: Steam

Note: -_italics_- Dark's thoughts.  
'_italics_' Daisuke's thoughts.  
/_italics_/ Krad's thoughts.

-o-

****

Kirei...  
Chapter 3: Steam.

  
  
Krad opened his eyes; he was alive. Taking a look around the room, he noticed a red, thick fog invading every inch of the room. Everything was black and red, a picture of death. He looked to his right; the candle had died as well, /_and so did Satoshi,_/ he added to himself. The thought made him sick, he couldn't believe his tamer had disappeared; his very core, his soul had vanished. There was nothing left, but a bitter memory and a future of loneliness.  
  
Sure, in the past day he had learnt many things about himself; those things that helped him understand that his blind devotion for his tamer had not been true. Still, having lost Satoshi hurt him more than anything he could remember at the moment. He was alone and empty... and he had become nothing more than a human. A mere human...  
  
Reflecting on the last thought for a moment, Krad tried to stand up, but all of his efforts had been futile. The pain had glued him to the spot on which he lay. He had no more magic, he was no longer immortal; he was just another human being. He could now experience physical pain like he had never done before; he felt helpless and vulnerable, much more than he'd ever felt. It was a blissful feeling though, it made him content; the stronger the pain, the more he alive he felt. He had, without intending to or taking part in the decision, finally been granted his wish. And even though he now had everything he ever wanted, like a body of his own and the possibility to lead a normal life, he found he could not enjoy it. He felt miserable; a part of him had died with Satoshi. He would have ended his own life then and there if he hadn't lifted the blue crystal blade and studied it, finally understanding everything.  
  
Satoshi had lost his will to live, the only thing he had ever relied on. The only thing he had left after his father had abandoned him. His only reason to live was to love Daisuke, but after the past day's events, he had lost that as well. There was nothing worth living anymore; not for him. But he had loved Krad, or at least cared about him enough to entrust him with his only possession: his body. Krad smiled, an action that seemed alien to him; not only had Satoshi broken his curse and given him a life of his own, he had also made him remember something he had forgotten long ago. He smiled a bitter, sad smile as he let the first tears roll down his cheeks. He now remembered how to cry. Placing the blade on his chest, he closed his eyes and let tiredness overcome him, forcing him to forget about everything for a while and lulling him to sleep.  
  
-o-  
  
Daisuke had to go through another day of classes, even though he felt tired and sad, not to mention extremely confused. He couldn't stop thinking about Krad and what Dark had told him the previous night. To make matters worse, Hiwatari had been absent once again and he was in charge of giving him his homework. That's why he was walking to the boy's apartment that afternoon, thinking of the words to say after all that had happened. He wasn't sure he had neither the energy nor the courage to face him, but he had to endure the situation, if only for his friend's sake. Dark hadn't spoken a single word that day, not even to warn him of the dangers of meeting with Hiwatari; nothing. It was as if he ignored him, though Daisuke knew deep inside that he wasn't.  
  
He rang the bell, expecting to hear his friend's sad voice asking for his identity. He waited a few minutes and rang again, thinking that the boy might have been busy and hadn't listened to the bell. A few more minutes passed and he grew worried, he rang again, but there was no answer. He looked at his wristwatch; he had been standing outside that door for almost twenty minutes. He knocked on the wooden surface now, hoping to make a louder noise than the bell. Still no answer.  
  
Finally feeling desperate, Daisuke typed a trick-code in the security lock, forcing the door open. Closing the door behind him, he dashed upstairs heading for his friend's bedroom. The bed was unmade and there wasn't a single sign of life in the room. Daisuke checked the bathroom, the kitchen and inside all of the unused rooms, everywhere. Still, he hadn't found the boy.  
  
Suddenly, a thought invaded his mind. '_What if he just left?_' he asked himself, suddenly feelings silly. '_When he comes back and finds me here, breaking into his home unwanted... I have to go._'  
  
Daisuke already had his hand on the doorknob, when Dark stopped him. -_There is a room you haven't checked,_- the thief told him, making him frown. '_What do you mean, Dark? I've already searched everywhere._' Sounding uncomfortable, the thief replied, -_then, did you discover the secret room, the altar?_-  
  
Daisuke became silent. He had no idea there was a secret room in the apartment and he didn't know how Dark had found out about it, either. Still, that wasn't the time to ask about it. '_Where is it?_' Daisuke asked as he frantically searched the walls for hidden doors. -_I'm not sure,_- replied the thief thoughtfully, -_but It think it was near the stairs..._- Daisuke walked to the wall under the stairs, feeling its surface for a secret passage. He found a small crack; pushing with all of his strength, he managed to open the secret door.  
  
Just as he entered the room, he felt sick to the stomach. The smell of blood made it difficult to breathe and the crimson steam filling the space wouldn't let him see. He walked with uncertain step through the mist blurring his vision, falling to the ground as he tripped over something... or rather someone.  
  
Coughing as he tried to blow the vapour away, he could make out the shape of a boy. At the sight of blond hair and blood, Daisuke lost control of his limbs, letting Dark take over his body. The thief would have gladly left the blond to rot, if it depended on him, but seeing the desperation in Daisuke's voice as he asked for answers, he decided best to help him. He took Krad by his feet and dragged him out of the altar and into the living-room, letting him rest on the carpet. The blond coughed up red smoke before coming round. When his eyes opened, they met the questioning gaze of his enemy, Dark. The thief stood before him, his arms crossed and looking murderously serious. Krad tried to get up, but he was still too weak. Dark, seeing the futile attempts of the blond at getting up, helped him.  
  
"Thank you," he spoke weakly. Dark shrugged and helped him sit down on the couch, meanwhile bearing the screams of Daisuke, demanding to let him talk to Krad. Of course, Dark mentally denied him his request, but promised he wouldn't do anything to hurt the blond. "Why are you here?" Krad asked puzzled and surprised at the same time at having the thief in the apartment and being helpful, no less.  
  
"Daisuke had to bring Hiwatari's homework," Dark answered coldly, frowning slightly when he saw a flicker of anguish in the blond's gaze. "What did you do to him?" he asked all of a sudden, making Krad's eyes widen in disbelief.  
  
"What do you mean?" he asked perplexed, "I would never hurt him!" he shouted, wincing in pain as he did so. Krad clutched at his stomach, he felt his insides twisting as Dark's words sunk in, disgusting him.  
  
"I don't believe you," Dark told him as he pulled the ritual knife from his back pocket. "You were holding this close to your chest when I found you. What is this and what happened to Hiwatari?"  
  
Krad's eyes looked glassy as he tried to fight back the tears. "I don't know what that blade is, Dark, the only thing I know is that Satoshi vanished. He's not here anymore, but it wasn't because of me, I swear!" Dark didn't look too convinced. He let the knife fall, its crystal blade shattering into dust. Krad finally broke down as he threw himself into the small pile of dust on the ground. "What did you do that for?" he wailed as he watched the blue powder slide through his fingers. He had lost the only thing linking him to Satoshi, the blade with the boy's blood. Now he had nothing and it was all because of Dark's fault.  
  
Suddenly enraged, feeling utter hatred towards the thief, he turned to look at him in the eye. His own gaze betrayed the sorrow and the thirst for revenge in his being. He lunged at Dark, closing his hands around the thief's neck with the only purpose of strangling him to death. He wanted nothing but to take the life out of him as if sucking out juice from an orange. He wanted the thief to suffer underneath him, he wanted to see him beg for forgiveness; he wanted to kill him in the slowest, most painful way possible.  
  
Dark smirked while he watched the blond's hurt gaze turn to a predatory glare. "Go on, Krad," he said softly, "put me out of my misery." Krad couldn't be any happier to comply. He squeezed harder, trying to block Dark's respiratory system. "I'm sure..." Dark managed between painful gulps of oxygen, "I'm sure Daisuke would love to see this side of you..."  
  
Krad abruptly released the thief's throat and backed away from him, covering his face in embarrassment and awe. He could not believe he had lost his composure in such a terrible way. He imagined Daisuke was thinking of him as a murderer now, his reaction to Dark's mistake backing up the thief's theory for Satoshi's death. Tears were running like rivers down the blond's cheek as he pleaded for forgiveness from the thief.  
  
Dark stood up, weak but never erasing the smirk off his face. "Come on, Krad, beg. I'm sure that's what you wanted from me only moments ago," he hurtfully teased the blond, trying to bring him closer to his final breakdown. He didn't care about anything anymore, he just wanted to see Krad broken and miserable. "Tell me you didn't want to kill me, tell Daisuke. Tell us both you didn't want to kill Satoshi, Krad." But the blond said nothing. He remained silent, crying salty tears of despair.  
  
"Come on, Krad," the thief choked out with venom, "show us I was wrong to believe you a murderer. Tell us what happened back in the altar!" He demanded this violently, feeling himself close to hysterics. "What happened to Satoshi, Krad? What was that blade covered in blood doing in there? How do you explain that slash in your left wrist?"  
  
"Dark, please," he croaked weakly, losing what little dignity he had left. "I can't stand this anymore, don't do this to me, Dark..."  
  
But the thief ignored him completely. He just turned his back and walked away, leaving the blond feeling weaker than he'd ever felt, helpless and completely alone as he thought of how much he needed someone to hold him at the time.  
  
Daisuke, having witnessed all, kept screaming inside Dark's head for him to release him, but the latter wouldn't even answer back. Crying, frightened at having seen a side of Dark he hadn't known until then, he closed his mouth. The thief left Satoshi's apartment, walking up with a quick pace and crying silently as he made his way through the streets into the Niwa household.  
  
When he reached home, Emiko Niwa was waiting for him. She had no idea of what had happened or what had he left to do, but seeing the dry stains of tears in the thief's face, she couldn't avoid asking him about it. "What happened, Dark? Are you alright?" she asked, feeling worried about him.  
  
"It's nothing, Emiko," he answered unconvincingly. "Everything will be alright," he knew he was lying, but there wasn't anything else for him to do. Except maybe... "Emiko," he spoke shyly as he pushed Daisuke's conscience deep inside himself to stop him from listening. "I think... it's time we do it." It sounded incoherent, but Emiko knew perfectly well what he was referring to.  
  
"Are you sure?" she asked hesitatingly. "It's very risky, Dark, you know the consequences." She was extremely worried, even more so than she'd been when she saw the thief's tearstained face. If Dark himself was asking her to take such desperate measures... _he might be involved in something serious,_ she thought.  
  
"I am, Emiko," he assured her. "We have to try, I don't care how dangerous it is."  
  
"I need to have a body of my own, if only for a few hours."  
  
-o-  
  
Krad lay curled in foetal position on the floor of the apartment's living room. He couldn't think anymore, he couldn't even move; the only thing he could do was breathe. In and out, in and out, it never seemed so difficult. He felt cold as he inhaled each time; he often been referred to as cold, an ice prince, but never before had he felt as cold and fragile as he was feeling at the time. In his current state, lying motionless on the ground, he felt things he'd never felt before. For one, he felt like he had lost all will to live. Of course, he wouldn't give in to those feelings, even if it was only because of Satoshi. The boy had given him everything and he was not going to let him down, even if that ruined his life.  
  
As the images of Satoshi's sad face invaded his mind, Krad became stronger. He would endure, he thought resolute as he struggled to get up. He was a human now, he was vulnerable and weak and had to take care of himself. Little things he'd never done before, such as eating or taking a bath, those things he had to learn how to do because his own existence now depended on them. He had to take care of himself because Satoshi would be looking at him from somewhere high above and he wouldn't be happy if he let himself fade away into nothingness. Yes, his reasoning might have seemed childish, but it was the best he could manage in his poor state. But he would endure, he had to.  
  
He pushed himself up from the floor, suddenly feeling strong and sure about himself. He was resolute to go on living, doing the best he could to lead a normal life, like any other human would do. But before he was allowed that right, he had to organise his life. He was going to start with the basic things; he would take a shower to clean himself and clear his mind and then he would try and cook something for him to eat. And if he burnt anything, he could always dial the pizza delivery service; he'd seen Satoshi do it many times. Yes, it was time for him to start thinking positively, as clichéd as it may have sounded.  
  
He walked to Satoshi's, no, his bedroom and took a pair of faded, loose pyjamas and a piece of underwear and headed for the bathroom. He picked a towel from the room's small cupboard and stripped off his worn-out clothes. He got inside the shower and turned on the tap; being inexperienced in such basic matters, he felt his skin burn as he realised he had released the hot water. Turning the other tap on, he regulated the water's temperature, finding comfort in the feeling of warm yet refreshing liquid running down his back and soaking his long hair.  
  
He spotted a shelf with a few bottles and boxes. He first looked for the soap, finding it inside one of the boxes; pausing to take in the scent of almond, he proceeded to rub the soap-bar over his body, rejoicing on the feel of soft foam covering his skin. He sighed happily as he experienced for the first time what it felt to wash himself, the relaxing metaphor of cleaning oneself off the unwanted dirt as if purifying one's soul. But he had yet another task to complete: washing his hair. As he picked his ponytail to undo it, he noticed his crucifix was missing. He also noticed that the length of his hair was not the same; though still quite long, it was definitely shorter, barely reaching past his waist.  
  
He chose the bottle of shampoo because of its scent, apple. He helped himself with a handful of the dense yet evasive substance and applied it through the roots of his hair to the ends. He scrubbed delicately, massaging his scalp in the process, feeling more and more relaxed. He spent a few minutes making sure he was clean, before he rinsed his hair off all foam. After having done so, he spent a while simply letting himself get soaked, before finally turning off both taps and stepping out of the shower. He picked up the towel he'd left hanging from the door's handle and dried himself up; even the feel of soft cotton over wet skin seemed blissful to him. Once he was completely dry, though his hair still drip-dropped, he pulled on the underwear and pyjamas and went to the kitchen.  
  
Krad opened the fridge and found bread, cheese and frozen ramen. Having no experience in cooking, he picked out bread and cheese and prepared two sandwiches. That was his only dinner before going back to the bathroom to pick the dirty clothes and put them in the washing machine. He would have turned it on, but he was afraid he would ruin it, after all, he didn't have the faintest clue on how to use it. Instead, he decided to go to sleep. He knew it was still early -it was only eight o'clock- but he preferred things to be like that. He'd had a hard day and he was tired, his human body having reached his limit for the day. He went to bed then, twisting and turning under the covers, smelling the scent of his tamer still impregnated in the bedclothes. He had to rest, make himself stronger; the next day would be another hard day: if he wanted to settle his life, he needed to talk to Daisuke.  
  
-o-  
  
Emiko and Daiki stood next to Dark. The thief was lying on a wide, long wood-board, looking scared but determined. The oldest Niwa seemed unsure, but at Dark's request he would take the risk. He turned to the boiling cauldron to his left and called for her daughter to help him; the potion was ready and all they needed now was a drop of both Dark and Daisuke's blood. Dark willingly offered his index finger, slashing through the skin and letting a single drop of the sweet liquid drip onto the boiling potion. Then, taking advantage of Daisuke's state -he was asleep-, he transformed into the boy's body and reached out his arm for Emiko to delicately cut his finger enough to draw the required ingredient. Taking back his shape, Dark inhaled deeply and tried to relax.  
  
Daiki stirred the potion clockwise seven times and counter-clockwise other three. When the ritual was over, he grabbed a spoonful of the thick-looking liquid and spilt it into a gold goblet, offering it to Dark who drowned the contents without stopping to breathe. Daiki spoke a prayer and now, after having been blessed by the pagan deities, all they could do was wait.  
  
-o-o-o- 

_First: please, don't kill me for killing Satoshi! It wasn't easy for me either, I truly adore that character, but... my muse demanded me to do it. You see, my muse is the sadistic Potions Master of Hogwarts, Severus Snape. Yes, I'm a hopeless case...  
Second: I really, really liked Krad's scene in the bathroom. It was nice writing about things that seem silly and unimportant to us humans from the point of view of someone who had never done them. I don't know, it was just nice... Krad discovering himself as a living being who has to take care of himself; imagine, just to take care of himself! I liked that, having a vulnerable Krad is cool.  
Third: What are Daiki, Emiko and Dark doing? Read the next chapter to find out! I really hope you're liking this piece of angsty reading. I know I am; I finally managed to write something serious and dark in the fanfiction world. Yeah, outside this DNAngel/Harry Potter world, I'm kind of a pro at writing depressing stuff. Yeah, it's bizarre... but I digress.  
As I was telling you, I hope you like this so far and if you do, please leave a review for me. I feed on them, I need them. I'm like a blood-sucking vampire... call me Alucard (I've been watching way too much Hellsing)._

**KageKitsune16:** la li ho! Yes, I'm cruel. But I warned you about this. Not like with Aoi; I warned it was going to be angsty and turned out to be all funny and ridiculous. Ah, anyway, I like writing angst... it's like a sort of catharsis... never mind me babbling, just keep reading and reviewing!  
**Felicity Dream:** here it is, I hope you like it just as much!  
**Staryday:** it's like that: everyone loves daisuke. Funnyhow I hadn't noticed until you and 'noone' told me about it... ah, well... and, yes, Satoshi did commit (a sort of) suicide, though I'm guessing you already know about that, ne? Ah, well, ja ne!!  
**Yuki Haitani:** darling, your fic already is amongst my favourite stories, are you kidding?? I thought you knew. Didn't I review it? Ah, well, the point is I love it. Could you, um, make it Dai/Krad? Sorry, but I love that pairing... thanks for reviewing by the way!!


	4. Chapter 4: Chance

**Note:** -_italics_- Dark's thoughts.  
'_italics_' Daisuke's thoughts.  
/_italics_/ Krad's thoughts.

-o-

****

Kirei...  
Chapter 4: Chance.

  
  
Cold. Unbearable, desolating cold. There was nothing else but that freezing sensation of loneliness... emptiness. It was as if he'd lost his soul, Daisuke decided, his eyelids still closed over his eyes protectively. He didn't want to wake up, though he wasn't sure why. He somehow feared what could happen if he let his eyes open. Those painful feelings of emptiness could not be good; they had to have a meaning. Daisuke was afraid of waking up; somehow, lost in his nightmares, he felt more secure than he guessed he would be once the world became real. But then again... he needed to know why he was suddenly so cold. Maybe he'd been sleeping so much that he missed the change of seasons and it was already winter? Maybe he had had a fever? He didn't know the answers, which was exactly why he needed to wake up. Still, he was so scared...  
  
Cold ironically wrapped him like a blanket, washing away the sorrow and all of those uncertainties. Everything was cold, as if it were snowing exclusively for him; so cold... he shivered unconsciously. He was so cold that the blackness blurring his vision had turned blue, light-blue just the same shade of the sky. Light, bright blue almost translucent, so pure and sincere. It was just like Krad's eyes...  
  
A soft breeze started blowing; he could feel the ends of his hair being caressed by that sweet, innocent touch. The way the wind whispered his name in his ear, made all of his worries seem minimal. Somehow, the cold that had glued him to the spot on which he lay, the same cold that had immobilised him, now seemed nothing more than a faraway breeze. Instead, a warm feeling of content was settling in. Daisuke felt the sides of his lips curling upwards in a smile; he was happy.  
  
But just as soon as that wonderful feeling of happiness had settled, another wave of sorrow washed it away, leaving the boy trembling and crying and feeling worse than he'd had when he woke up. He felt as if he had a strait-jacket of snow binding him to the surface on which his body rested. He could not move his limbs, the only thing he seemed to be in control of were his eyes and yet he did not want to open them. As if from a very long distance, he could hear the whispers of the wind telling him to wake up, begging for him to open his eyes. Those whispers... they echoed like the voice of the one he loved, Krad. In fact, Daisuke could now tell it was only one voice, low and soft as if caressing his eardrums; Krad's voice, pleading for him to meet him.  
  
Daisuke opened his eyes, those crimson orbs wide like saucers with fear and desperation. He looked around, studying the room he was in, searching for Krad, but there was no one there; he was alone. Sighing, he slowly brought a hand up to his cheek to wipe away the tears. Everything was dark, like a black fog trying to fool him to get lost in its pits of endless misery. So dark... like Dark himself.  
  
He now remembered. Dark had asked for his grandfather to help him, he wanted something, but Daisuke wasn't sure of what that was. He thought it had something to do with... yes, he now remembered clearly. He looked to his side; through the obscure blur, he could make out the shape of his inner self. Dark, the legendary phantom thief, lay peacefully by his side, resting in a body of his own. Daisuke noticed he was naked, like he himself was; he looked so vulnerable with his pale skin grazed only by the rays of moonlight slipping through the only window in the room. He was perfect, Daisuke noticed, as if he'd been sculpted by an artist. He could have easily passed as one of the Hikaris' works of art, Daisuke decided as he smiled.  
  
The truth was that Daisuke loved his other self. He loved Dark dearly, just not in the same way he loved Krad. He had often wondered what it would feel like to simply kiss Dark through that mirror they used to talk between themselves. Still, the idea seemed so thrilled that he hadn't dared trying it. But the doubt and the uncertainty had always been there. He still wondered, especially now that he had the boy lying bare in front of him, how it would feel to kiss him.  
  
Still, he was in love with someone else, he could not -and would not- risk that feeling for anything else. Daisuke walked away from Dark with a determined step and thinking of Krad. He was in love, but he had much to learn. He was resolute now, he was going to visit him and ask for answers. Then... then, he would simply think. And decisions would come later, once he had his thoughts organised.  
  
'_Yes,_' he thought, '_that is what I'm going to do._'  
  
-o-  
  
There was a knock at the door. Krad twisted in his bed-sheets, grumbling to himself and feeling tired and almost unable to open his eyes. He was not used to feeling all of these strange sensations. He'd never needed sleep and now here he was, fighting the urge to cuddle into a ball and never wake up. Still, that annoying rapping went on and on -it seemed each time louder- until he finally let his eyes flutter open. He flung his legs over the side of the bed and got up, stretching his limbs as he walked barefoot to the door.  
  
"Hello?" he asked in a hoarse voice, a voice that didn't seem to match the softness of his skin and the brightness of his blond hair. It seemed odd to hear such ugly noises coming from his throat, instead of the familiar feather-like chanting, usually so cold and neutral.  
  
"Krad, I... need to talk to you."  
  
The blond backed away from the door, involuntarily. He had no idea why the boy was there and what he needed to talk to him about, the only thing he seemed to notice was the increasing of his heartbeats' speed. Sure, he had previously decided to meet him, to tell him how he felt and maybe to ask him why he felt like that, but this situation was simply unexpected.  
  
"In-- in a minute," he stuttered his reply as he staggered to his room to put on some clothes. It was a rather chilly day, so he picked a worn-out black wool sweater and a pair of black slacks. He was still barefoot and the floor felt cold under his feet, so he pulled out a pair of socks and put them on. Tying his hair up in a ponytail, he walked to the door and opened it, revealing the nervous features of one Daisuke Niwa.  
  
"Good morning, Krad," he simply spoke. There wasn't much he could say at the time, after all. The blond replied with a nod and let him in. Daisuke couldn't help but notice he was entirely dressed in black. He could not remember ever having seen him wearing that colour, or any other colour but white and a bit of golden yellow. He looked so... human, as odd as that sounded. His hair messily falling down his shoulders in an untidy ponytail, his eyes swollen and half-lidded from sleep, even his cotton-clad feet looked different. He was simply unrecognisable, Daisuke decided, but equally beautiful. Maybe even more.  
  
"I'm sorry about... the mess," Krad said not so brightly, trying his best to act as a regular human being.  
  
"It's okay," Daisuke told him, "I didn't come to talk about that, anyway."  
  
"And," Krad risked asking with hesitant tone, "what is it you want to talk about?"  
  
Daisuke couldn't answer at once. Instead, he lowered his gaze to the floor and concentrated on a black stain on the carpet. There were so many things he'd like to discuss, actually. He had one thing in mind that overweighed the rest, but yet all those doubts, all those questions with no answers kept coming back to his mind. But he didn't have much time before Dark woke up... "I want you to tell me what happened to Satoshi," he said, Krad flinching when the name was spoken. "I want to know what happened and why."  
  
The blond sighed, walking past Daisuke to sit on the living room's couch; the very same couch where they shared that breath-taking kiss that changed their lives completely. Daisuke followed him, sitting down as well; he was close enough to feel the other's warmth but remained distant enough not to pressure Krad. The blond hung his head back and stared at the ceiling; there was nothing fascinatingly interesting about it, but it was the most appealing thing at the time, it seemed. With his head still resting on the back of the couch, he turned to look at his beloved. "This is what happened," he said and told the redhead everything he knew, or at least understood, about Satoshi's decision.  
  
Daisuke felt a pang of guilt for not having been able to return the boy's feelings and, indirectly, having caused so much pain. It seemed that, in a way, all that had happened had been his fault. But then again, he always blamed himself for whatever happened. This time, he thought things would be different; he'd stop blaming himself and start caring about himself. But given the circumstances, he had quite a lot of pondering to do. For one, there was his love for Krad. Apart from that, he had Dark to worry about; he'd never even imagined the kaitô was in love with him, yet now that he knew, he couldn't help but feel a little pity for him. After all, he knew well enough how horrible it was to love someone and not have those feelings returned.  
  
"Niwa..." the blond addressed the boy without even meeting his gaze. "What are you thinking about?" He had a curious yet pained look on his face as he asked; Daisuke thought it probably had something to do with the uncertainty and insecurity he felt. He didn't know how he knew about it, but he could feel those sensations radiating off the boy.  
  
"Actually, I was thinking about you." Krad turned to look at Daisuke as he spoke, blushing and trying to hide his face behind his loose red-coloured bangs. "You look... different." Krad looked at him puzzled and he explained, "for one, you haven't got your wings; I've never seen you without them. And your hair is different, shorter, I think; your eyes are different, too, they don't look cat-like anymore. Did something happen to you to make such drastic changes?"  
  
"I--" Krad stuttered, "I thought you knew..."  
  
Daisuke shook his head, he was truly clueless. The previous day, when he had found him lying unconscious in the altar, he hadn't listened to a single word he'd spoken nor seen him after transforming into Dark. Everything he knew was that Satoshi had died and now, after having been told the story, he understood it had been Satoshi's decision to kill himself. But the changes in Krad's appearance were evident and so, he felt the urge to ask about them. Still, Krad thought he knew; why would he know, did it have anything to do with him?  
  
"I'm... a human."  
  
Those simple words struck like a lightning bolt through his heart. Such a simple statement and yet he couldn't understand it. It was as if his brain refused to work; maybe it was his subconscious making fun of him. Whatever the reasons were, he had to ask for an explanation. Somehow, he couldn't imagine Krad, the angel-like demon, in the skin of an ordinary human.  
  
Krad sat back on the couch and closed his eyes. His voice sounded calm though threatening to shatter any minute as he spoke. "As you probably know already, there are two ways of ending both the Niwa and the Hikari curses," Daisuke nodded. "Very well, um, our case is different from yours; to rid himself off the curse -that is to say, me- the tamer has to sacrifice himself, there is no other way. However," the blond paused to collect his thoughts. "The tamer has the option of making a ritual in which he sacrifices his body for the curse to possess. Of course, no one ever did something like this, even when they knew it was the only, definite way to defeat me, so to speak." Daisuke's brain still refused to work, making him look confused. Krad carried on with the last part of his explanation. "Once the curse possesses the body, he loses all of his powers, becoming a human and no longer a threat for anyone." Krad opened his honey-coloured eyes and finally met Daisuke's gaze. His eyes betrayed sincerity and sadness, the glassy-looking orbs a perfect picture of helplessness. "That is what I've become, a human. There is no longer a curse bonding me to the Hikaris, I've been freed."  
  
"Satoshi..." Daisuke babbled to himself, letting Krad hear him. "Satoshi did this... why?"  
  
"That is what I've been asking myself since yesterday. Why?"  
  
The two of them remained silent, as they watched the afternoon sun settle in the horizon. They've been sitting in that couch for hours, Dark probably suspected about his departure. He had to go, yet he wished he could stay forever like this, simply listening to Krad speak. This mere sensation was all he needed to understand what he felt about the boy; he was truly in love. Looking back at Krad who had once again closed his eyes, he told him sincerely, "even though I loved Satoshi as a friend and I'm really hurt about his decision..." Krad opened his eyes and looked at him, anxiety evident on his face; he was curious to find out what the redhead had to say. "I'm glad you are now free."  
  
The words fell like a blanket of hope on Krad's body, embracing him in warmth. For the first time in his long existence, someone was glad he was alive; he was no longer a curse, but a person. Daisuke told him what Satoshi would have; someone cared for him. His mood suddenly cracked and he shed tears of anguish for all the people he'd hurt through the years. He cried for all the beings that had borne his spirit and specially, he cried for Daisuke, whom he'd once tried to kill. The one he'd considered a threat and an unwanted burden was the one who now made him feel wanted and special. He was the one who had brought light to his monochromatic life. "Thank you," he said, unashamedly showing his tears to the boy.  
  
Daisuke smiled, he nodded and stood up, ready to leave. He was already at the door when he turned on his back and marched up to where Krad was sitting. The blond backed away in apprehension as Daisuke leaned in to kiss him. Their lips touched briefly and as soft as silk, aggressive and loaded with their feelings of sadness and despair. Without saying a word and leaving Krad stunned beyond words, the redhead walked away from the apartment.  
  
Krad touched his lips with his fingers, the faint taste of almonds vivid in his mind. Daisuke had kissed him, so that meant he loved him. Not only he cared about him, but he also loved him. It was overwhelming, Krad decided, to have so many revelations thrown at his face in only one day. Yet, as he tried to rid his mind of all thoughts, he found he couldn't stop thinking about it all. He couldn't even tear his fingers from the spot in which he'd been kissed. Such a short but sweet gift from the one he had fallen in love with was enough to make everything seem unimportant. Even Satoshi's death, though still an unhealed wound, seemed a distant echo when compared to this. If being a human meant to feel things so strongly and devotedly, he was glad he'd become one.  
  
-o-  
  
When Daisuke arrived home, he wasn't surprised to find a certain purple-haired boy standing by the door and looking worried. He briefly considered running away back to Krad's apartment, but dismissed the idea, thinking that would only make things worse. Sighing, he took each painful step to where Dark was, hoping he wouldn't be too angry with him. He wasn't sure why he cared whether or not Dark was angry; after all, he'd already decided to start caring about himself and not everyone else as he usually did. But then again, he didn't know whether Dark was angry or hurt; if it were the second option, he wasn't sure he'd be able to respond properly.  
  
"You went to see him, didn't you?" Dark asked without even lifting his gaze from the floor. He looked calm, though he kept and edgy tone to his voice. Even though he tried to hide his face, Daisuke could see the tearstains on his pale cheeks, his perfect skin tainted with salty liquid. It seemed surreal to be seeing Dark Mousy crying; yet, he knew better than anyone that those tears were true and that they had a reason to flow.  
  
Daisuke hadn't answered to his question, giving Dark all the information he needed. He had done what he did only for Daisuke, yet the boy hadn't noticed. He'd bared himself of his essence, given the boy his freedom but all for nothing. Daisuke only cared about Krad, while he was left with a feeling of regret and his hands empty; there would never be someone to hold him while he cried, he thought, since the only one he'd ever truly wanted was the one that would never love him back.  
  
"I'm not going to interfere anymore," he told Daisuke bitterly. "However, I am going to ask you to give me a chance; you've already listened to what he had to say, it's only fair you listen to me as well." Daisuke nodded and did his best to refrain from running away in panic. Suddenly tired, he sat on the steps to his door, Dark following his moves and sitting next to him.  
  
"I've already told you I love you," Dark started saying, "and I already told you what I think of him," Daisuke nodded. "You know me better than anyone else ever did, so there isn't much I can tell you. There is only one thing you don't know about me and I can only show it you. After that, you're free to make your decision; I'll never interfere again." Daisuke nodded again, curious as to what the kaitô wanted to show him. Apologising in a low, almost inaudible whisper, Dark closed the space between them and, doing what he does best, locked his lips with Daisuke's stealing a kiss from him.  
  
'_So... this is what he wanted to show me,_' Daisuke thought while being kissed. '_I can tell by the sweetness of his touch that all of his feelings are true and that he never tried to hurt me. Everything he wanted from the beginning was to be with me and see me happy; but, of course, he wanted to be the one to make me happy. Still, my heart has been taken and even though he tastes of heaven itself, such blissful sensation I could lose myself in, I cannot let this happen. I have to make up my mind and he needs to know._'  
  
Pulling apart, Daisuke licked his lips and tried to speak. But before he could utter a single word, Dark placed a finger on his lips and told him not to say anything. He held his gaze for a moment, before looking away and standing up. He rubbed his sleeve over his eyes to dry them off; he'd been crying again, Daisuke noticed. He stood up as well and gently placed an arm over Dark's shoulder in a soothing way. Dark pulled away from the touch and with a hurt, glassy stare, addressed the boy. "Tomorrow I'm going to steal the Oni to Tenshi painting," he said, "you can tell me about your decision then." With that, he headed for the door and opened it, leaving it ajar for Daisuke to enter the house as well.  
  
-o-o-o- _Ooooooh, what's going to happen? Only I know, but you'll find out eventually. This story is really short, next chapter's the last one. After that, there's an epilogue. And after that there's another fic. I love writing... I'm not really good at it, but I like it a lot. Ah, anyway... hey, I really hope you liked this and, as usual, I expect your reviews, okay? See you next week, ja ne!!_

**KageKitsune16:** here you have it, more angsty crap for your enjoying pleasure  
**Staryday:** I'm glad you liked that scene... I liked it too  
**Felicity Dream:** ohhh... things happen... this is crazy...  
**Darkness Rising: **the manga is the best thing I've ever read


	5. important note

Hello everyone (that goes for both Aoi & Kirei readers –I was too lazy to write two different notes-)!!! Hey, I'm sorry about the lack of updates, but it's been really hard for me to even finish a line, because I got a rather tiring job (I work in a comics store, isn't it a dream?? Yes, it is...) anyway, the point is that I don't have much free time (read "none") and I couldn't finish the stories. However, I WILL finish them even if it's the last thing I do. This Sunday (Sundays are my leisure days) I will sit down and write and hopefully, I'll have both stories finished by Monday or Tuesday. Please, be patient with me, my life is a bit messy now. But I'm happy, anyway, and that's what counts...  
Thanks for understand (IF you understood ) and keep waiting, just a little bit more, for the new Kirei and Aoi chapters.  
Arigatou gozaimasu, ja ne!!!


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